Who are my siblings, my family?

All through the Bible up until the 18th century, marriages were arranged by families where the women were often seen as property to be purchased for child-bearing. During the Middle Ages, marriage became a way to increase your families social standing in Europe and the Roman Catholic Church became involved to make sure things were done "properly", though wedding ceremonies in churches were rarely done before the 15th century. It wasn't until the 19th century that women started to have some say of who they could marry and keep their property and income, people then started thinking about love as a part of marriage. Marriage is one of the 7 sacraments of the Roman Catholic Church and we now have the covenant of marriage, an agreement between two people who are going all in for each other to build a new family based on love. 

We can see this in the story of Ruth. Naomi's husband and two sons die and she is returning home to Israel to get charity from her people and extended family. She tells her two daughter-in-laws to return to their families because the only way for them to be married again with her is for Naomi to be married again, raise two more boys and wait for them to become men. Ruth decides that she cannot leave Naomi and pretty much makes a covenant with her, "your God will be my God, your people will be my people, and where you are buried, I will be buried." This is very unusual in that time, or maybe any time, but a new relationship has been created here, Ruth is not just a child-bearer for Naomi's son, but now is directly the family of Naomi, pledged to follow her, care for her, and be buried with her. 

Yesterday in our discipleship group we were talking about reading the Bible and how we read it. I admitted for over 20 years I read the Bible with the mindset of proving Biblical literalists and evangelicals wrong from their simple interpretation and everything is about going to heaven through belief. Here in today's scripture, it pops in again, Jesus tells the crowd, "Whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my mother, my brother, and my sister." Not, whoever believes in me, but whoever follows God. Jesus, as the oldest male in his family, will lead the family when his father dies. In this story, his mother and brothers are outside the crowd wanting to talk with him, probably to say he has to take up his responsibilities as the oldest male to lead the family. Time to come home and take care of the family business. Jesus responds, "Here is my mother, and my brothers" creating a new definition of family and making new boundaries of who is in and who is out. Jesus' definition of family more than just blood lines, this is the cup of the new covenant. 

Rev. Dr. Eugene Peterson who translated the message wrote about covenant:

This kingdom of God life is not a matter of waking up each morning with a list of chores or an agenda to be tended to, left on our bedside table by the Holy Spirit for us while we slept. We wake up already immersed in a large story of creation and covenant, of Israel and Jesus, the story of Jesus and the stories that Jesus told. We let ourselves be formed by these formative stories, and especially as we listen to the stories that Jesus tells, get a feel for the way he does it, the way he talks, the way he treats people, the Jesus way.

Throughout the ages, throughout the Bible, and throughout the churches history, marriage and family have been tried to be controlled, to be defined by the powers that be, but there has always been the exceptions to the rule that have paved a way for something new. An activity I would use with youth groups at camps is to have them come up with today's ad slogans and turn them into something 'churchy'. One of the examples I would use to get them started is: the church is a lot like the Olive Garden, when you're here, you are family! In 2005, the General Synod of our denomination came out for same-sex marriage and it was made the law of the land in 2013. What holds families together is not the marriage certificate or the approval of the church and state, it is a covenant that is worked on and worked through daily, sometimes joyously, and often times grudgingly, to be together and stay together in the good and bad times. Sometimes it is about survival, but it is always about being a part of something that is bigger than ourselves. 

In our church, we are family, we care and love each other. In our church, we invite all who want to be a part of our family to come and be welcomed. In our church, we covenant together to walk in love by being Open and Affirming and being a Just Peace church that cares and acts about the world around us and the least of these in our society and over all the planet. Amen.